Warning: This is smut from Mae's angle, graphic and not very erotic. I hope it's not too gross.
Also, I've updated twice since we last spoke. So if you're missing the update that begins with Mae cleaning up Danny, you need to read that first.
After my eyes grew used to the sudden change in lighting, I noticed he had his own pale phosphorescence too. Not the glow of a Calaquendi, not that deep. His smooth unlined skin drew and reflected what small light was left hanging in the air of the room . He was still moving on me, moving over me, more intently now. The mouth on my nipple bit a little, his kisses hit the flesh hard.
And I wanted him to take me down with him, wherever he was going. I moaned.
He made some muffled noise of approval. They always want to know they’ve turned you on. It must be the ultimate ego trip. Well Danny, you have turned me on completely and utterly, not just at the base of my spine but in my chest too. You don’t know what it’s cost me but you have. I hope you’re satisfied.
He moves against my thighs. He’s far from satisfied yet.
We’re in the dark now; it feels more secret as if the actions we perform beneath its cover could be hidden from our own memories. I think how many times I’ve lived with the feeling the world had turned to rottenness, the feeling of nothing ever being the same again. Once in Angband, once when I woke, once when he died, once when I let the Silmaril fall. It too is becoming a habitual visitor. Each time, the sun rose and set again, one day, two days and then on the day when I could feel I was living in the world again. It’s depressing how easily I get over pain really; all this heartbreak you think some of it would have the power to stick.
So nothing lasts as long as a Quendi. Even hurt is only a temporary holiday of the senses. Everything fell apart and I thought if I am having an existential crisis on in bed with a pretty naked mortal I might as well enjoy myself. Let flesh tell the history since it endures longer than marks on the soul. Tonight, let be become a creature of flesh alone.
You think too much Nelyo, I thought to myself. Then I pulled myself on top of Danny and didn’t think anymore.
We laughed when the light flickered back on and caught us mid-depravity. It felt good to laugh, to share. I hadn’t felt conspiratorial about sex for a long time, not with the person I was doing it with anyhow. It was always me against them. Now it was us against desire. Us against the ache and the hardness and the will become one with the other’s very skin.
The rest of our conversation was very technical. Given the circumstances of what we were involved in, you could call it obscene. There wasn’t much poetry from elf or mortal, just a muffled panting sharing of the sensations we were inflicting on each other.
The lights went up and I was on my back, legs akimbo, stroking myself while Danny thrust away with abandon. He must have been able to see the whole deal. He watched the action with no sense of shame. There was no shade on the bulb, no softening of its harsh glow, just the involved anatomy red and swollen with need, slick with lube against pale skin and cheap sheets. Then he looked into my eyes and I saw such pleasure there I laughed out loud.
How long has it been since I was happy to make someone happy by being this undignified? Simply happy. Here I am with your cock in my arse tugging away at myself and it’s lovely because you see it and smile. I’m happy to be here. Happy to be seen like this. Now please, fuck me harder.
The light flickered off and on all night, catching us unawares in all manner of poses of debauch. We twisted and turned each other like shop front mannequins all in the name of slaking the hunger that roamed wild through our bodies. I felt as if for one night only I’d let something vicious and starving out of its cage and it wanted to devour all in its path before being locked up again. I bent Danny over the headboard and moaned into his ear as I took him. Daniel. Daniel, his name sounded dirty in itself, guilt by association.
Sometimes the light caught us when we were resting. Stealing a few moments lying side by side to get our breath back. We didn’t touch then, we lay like tin soldiers in a box. But our eyes roamed over each other’s bodies all the same. The light caught me surveying the flesh that had given me such pleasure with tender gratitude, with wonder and hope, and I was not ashamed to be seen by it’s naked eye doing that either.
I don’t know when morning came. I don’t know if the night held out until we couldn’t wring another ounce of pleasure from our bodies before permitting the sun to rise. All I know is he turned to me and I know our little vacation from life was over. He was shaking as he dressed. I helped him stay upright. I wanted to give him something to show how thankful I was.
I was thankful too the spell was almost broken. We could walk back together; maybe I’d hold his hand like we did as we wound our way down here. We’d go up and up and closer to the sunlight and maybe by the time we were back in the club we would not quite recognise each other as the one we had submitted to so completely. We’d be creatures of our shadows, phantoms met on the Ollore Malle, little more than a wet dream. He’d walk out of the club and I’d go upstairs for the rubbery, unsatisfying breakfast that was provided on the house, chew over the gamey gradvalax and chew over the night’s events with the other whores. It was a pathway back to normality. I’d still be a little shaken on the way home, but going home and getting into a hot bath, washing the traces and the taste of him from off my skin would be a start. It would be a start to the string of sun rises and sun sets before all was normal again. I’d clean my teeth and get my hair re-braided and by the end of this week, next week I’d walk with my memories beneath the new leaves again. It would be too late for the cherry blossom this year, but I have an eternity.
All this ended when I stood there waving him off and instead of saying goodbye, he asked me to come home.
Mae give the $10,000 to Deedee. It's why she now has a house.